A Dream of You 8/21/13

I had a dream the other night that you and I walked through a city’s streets with our fingers intertwined.

Your hand felt so real. My chest felt tight. I was so nervous. And there you were just smiling at me, the happiest I had ever seen you.

I kept my eyes shut tight when I woke, hoping that maybe you wouldn’t fade as fast. I couldn’t make you stay.

I had a dream last night that I was walking those same city streets with you. I was just as nervous, you were just as pretty. I went to grab your hand and this time you moved away. The motion felt so real. I felt sick. I knew I should be nervous. And there we were now walking in silence the look on your face, disgusted, the rejection I faced too real.

I wish I could follow my dreams, but when faced with every possibility the latter situation wins out and I could never subject myself to that again. I hate being the way I am and I’m sorry that I won’t ever see you as happy as I saw you that first night.